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Chapter 098: The Taste of Missing


It turns out that I fell in love with him earlier than he fell in love with me.

If I want to let go and think I can let go, then how can I call it deep love?

Our rhythm frequencies were never on the same line from the beginning.

I wiped away my tears and continued watching without feeling sleepy at all, even though it was already past midnight.

I hugged Lorna and lay on the lawn, enjoying the heavy tranquility of this moment.

I couldn't be happier.

Maybe I'm not ready yet, I don't know.

I closed my eyes seemingly calmly, but my heart was in turmoil.

Until Lorna took the initiative to break up and never see each other again.

I was really stunned.

I never thought that she would make such a choice.

It seemed that the conclusion that she and my uncle colluded and premeditated the situation was so self-defeating.

I don't know how other people behave and do things.

I like to recognize people by seeing things.

I heard that these two words don't actually have any influence on me.

She couldn't bear my pain.

She told me that she would abort the child and never look for me again.

After I heard it, my heart seemed to be bleeding.

I should be happy.

There is no devil around.

I am just pregnant, so what.

Now that this situation occurs, there are more abortions.

However, I actually cried when she held me in my arms.

I cried uncomfortably, and I wanted to ask something, such as if I needed money.

But her throat suddenly swelled up, making it difficult to speak.

Finally, she pushed me away without warning and ran away, getting into a taxi without looking back.

At this moment, I really wanted to chase her.

For such a woman, all people have is nostalgia and endless yearning.

I finally experienced what it means to truly miss someone.

She no longer bothered me.

She stopped bothering me because of my pain.

Although she succeeded this time, she succeeded in getting me here.

When I got home, as expected, my mother always cared about me, and my father kept scolding and cursing me.

Looking at my state, he knew that I had played with something.

I don't want to pay attention to anyone, I just want to hide in my room, hide under the quilt, and cry.

I never imagined that I would have such a vulnerable side.

Time passed day by day, and my uncle was still playing with me unscrupulously, but in order to defeat my uncle, my father asked me to continue, continue.

As I continued, I couldn't bear it any longer, and my energy began to fade away.

I felt extremely empty and lonely inside, and I didn't know what to do.

Gradually, it seemed that I was relying on various drugs to numb myself.

It's only been more than a month, but I couldn't hold it anymore.

I looked for her, but I couldn't find her.

I seemed to be late.

Only then did I feel that she had really left me.

I regret so much, I regret so much Is this the reason why people only know how to cherish when they lose it?

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Only after losing him did he realize how important this person was to him.

I even had a hallucination that she would come back to me with the baby.

But I used to be such a waste and so unsteady.

Didn't I already disappoint her to the extreme?

It seems that I have never asked her heart, and I have never really cared about her.

Falling into the abyss starts from now on.

Dad thought I was acting, but I am not an actor and I always make the same mistakes.

The fake show is really done.

I lost myself, driving my car crazy on the city road Day after day, this kind of suffering is terrible.

I went to nightclubs, every nightclub, especially after playing that stuff.

When choosing a channel, I always choose a woman who looks like Lorna.

Even if there is just a little bit of resemblance, height, nose, eyes, ears, anywhere, that's fine.

Subconsciously, I hope to see Lorna in person again, even if she goes back to being a lady, no matter what, I want to see her.

Playing drunkenly and dreamily, someone called me a young man.

But no one really understands my heart.

He saw many women, singing and drinking with him, but in his heart he only had the woman named Lorna.

I often drink too much, and one time I drank the most, I showed them the ugly tattoo on my heart.

"What do you guys call them?

Do they have this word?"

Someone named Nana rushed over and hugged me, and I laughed.

Dragging the girls on a racing car, crashing around, they were all scared.

Only the one named Nana seemed special.

He didn't seem to be afraid, and he even came close to me and touched my body, "Master Huo, I'm free tonight."

I sneered lightly and grabbed her chest, "It's too big.

I like smaller ones."

I seemed to be crazy, and I was not interested in women.

My spirit seemed to be floating in a boundless ocean with no place to belong.

An old classmate asked me to have a party.

When I went there, I brought a group of girls with me.

The scene was very embarrassing, but I didn’t like him.

I acted more and more fancy, so I felt more comfortable with the date.

It seems like no one in this city doesn't know about it.

I, Huo Hanyu, like to find young ladies.

When playing, bring three or five people with you, go to the suite, drink and get drunk, play those things, they like it, and it’s free, so you don’t have to spend money.

I'm also willing to spend this money.

I just don't want to be alone, it would be nice to have a lady with me.

"Master Huo, you hate me, why don't you stay with me?"

Someone pulled me into the room.

I followed her in and pinched her hard and ambiguously.

"Think of a way to make me interested in you."

Watching that girl fuck me with all her strength without feeling anything, it was enough, and I felt more and more irritated.

I once suspected that I was going to die.

I wasted my time.

I had played too much and was getting retribution.

I drove them away again and lay alone on the big bed, thinking about that woman melancholy.

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She exists along with drugs.

When you get older, you will miss this poisonous woman.

I secretly did it when I was slightly awake.

I went to see a doctor, and the doctor said that it might be a psychological problem, not a problem with my body, but something wrong with my body.

So sad.

Slowly, I stopped caring.

It doesn't matter anymore.

Feng Xueyan suddenly found me in the box of the nightclub, where I was playing.

She slapped me, drove all the women and men out of the room, and hugged me while crying.

"It's all Rona's fault, otherwise you wouldn't be like this."

"Don't mention her."

My peripheral nerves were suddenly touched.

Pushed Feng Xueyan away, "Don't come to me, stay away from me."

"I will not leave you, I will save you."

Feng Xueyan cried, looking like a holy mother.

"Do you think anyone can save me?

You think you can do it?

Let me tell you Feng Xueyan.

It's almost done.

Stop pestering me.

It's not good for you to pester me.

I will never marry you in this life, no.

If you get married, you will be useless, do you understand?"

I giggled.

He collapsed on the sofa crookedly, closed his eyes, listened vaguely, and jumped freely in his own thoughts.

"I believe I can save you.

People's hearts are so cruel.

I don't believe I'm treating you like this.

You are indifferent."

Feng Xueyan ran to me and cried.

"You look so ugly when you cry."

I don't know what happened to me, but I spoke so venomously to her.

Maybe I was too annoyed that she was disturbing the joyful atmosphere I had just created.

"Honey, haven't you always wanted me?

I'll give it to you."

Feng Xueyan was also driven crazy by me and had never said such a thing in front of me.

She has always had her pride.

She started to take off my clothes and pulled out my pants very unskillfully.

"Are you a lady?

Why are you doing this to yourself?"

I was a little annoyed, and I didn't know how hard I used to push her to the ground.

Don't say that I don't feel it now.

Even if I do, I can't touch her.

I can't touch her.

It seems that no woman can touch her now.

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"Huo Hanyu, you have gone too far."

Feng Xueyan felt very wronged.

She had never felt like this before, and her heartache for me was written all over her face.

But what should I do?

What should I do?

I just smiled bitterly and didn't respond to her.

"Can you come back?"

Feng Xueyan asked forcefully.

"No, you can find your own happiness."

I just answered like this.

I even really hope that she can find her own happiness.

I don't want her family to be in trouble and my father asks me to chase her back in the future.

I don't want this anymore.

Feng Xueyan got up, turned off the music, wiped her tears and sat next to me, not saying anything.

She was probably ashamed of what she had just done.

Quietly, except for her sobbing, I could only hear my own heartbeat.

I smoked a cigarette and looked at the colorful lights on the roof.

I hallucinated.

I floated up in excitement, and then I saw that woman in my hallucination.

I knew it was an illusion, but I didn’t want to get out of it.

"How can you change it?"

Finally, she asked me feebly

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