"Welcome to bbc news."
"In the past few days, the whole world has been enthusiastically playing a new game called masturbation launched by a startup company in Southampton."
"Speaking of this new game, the graphics are very ordinary, even rough.
Some people even say that it is something that some otaku made in front of the computer to amuse himself while eating instant noodles.
But surprisingly, it has become popular on the Internet.
It sparked a frenzy.”
“On the day the game was launched, Google officially stated that the term masturbation became the most searched keyword that day.
In the following days, this keyword was still the most popular search term.
It can be said that the term masturbation was almost universal. ” "Let's see what news comes from Manchester."
The scene cuts to the motorway south of Manchester.
"That afternoon, the Manchester Highway Patrol discovered a very bizarre violation of traffic rules.
A truck driver illegally parked on the highway.
When our patrol officers discovered it and went to investigate, they found that he was illegally parked on the highway.
Playing mobile games and masturbating in the cab with legs crossed.”
"When our patrol officer asked him to show his ID immediately and accept the penalty, the driver did not cooperate immediately.
Instead, he begged our patrol officer bitterly and said, please, please, wait until I finish this round first, okay. "?"
"Later, our patrol officers learned that this driver was obsessed with a masturbation game that had just been launched a few days ago, and he was determined to compete for the top spot on the ranking list.
Before leaving the house, he finally grabbed the top spot, but he drove halfway. , but found that his first place in the rankings had been taken away, so he parked illegally in desperation, just to regain the first place.”
When talking about this, the news anchor of BBC TV joked happily.
"Perhaps Arsenal should invite this truck driver to replace Wenger.
I believe that his enthusiasm for winning the first place can lead Arsenal out of the predicament of not having a championship for many years."
"America's Midday News."
"At four o'clock this morning, a hospital in New York, USA received a 20-year-old emergency patient.
He found that his right finger was cramped, unable to move, and also swollen.
After testing, the doctor determined that he Suffered from mild tenosynovitis.”
"According to our reporter's subsequent interview at the hospital, the patient was lying on the hospital bed playing mobile games."
"He admitted to reporters that because he was concerned about his performance on the WeChat friend rankings, he stayed up all night playing a WeChat game called Masturbation on his mobile phone, which resulted in cramps in his right hand."
"He finally succeeded in getting himself number one on the friends list, but he paid the price of being hospitalized."
"Reporting from Japan's Fuji Shimbun."
"Today, Mr.
Yamamoto, who lives in Tokyo, decided to sue WeChat Japan because the latest game launched by WeChat called Masturbation caused him to lose his 62-year-old father."
The screen turned and a mosaicd interviewer appeared.
"My father is sixty-two years old and has never been in good health.
He retires at home and exercises whenever he has nothing to do."
"However, ever since he became obsessed with WeChat, he has been obsessed with chatting with his WeChat friends all day long.
His monthly phone bills and data traffic have increased dramatically.
Especially in the past few days, WeChat has launched a new app called WeChat.
The game of airplanes.”
"In order to compete for the ranking in the game, my father played the game day and night.
He would not go to the hospital when he had a cold, which made his condition worse.
Even when he fell ill in the hospital bed, he could not help but take out his mobile phone.
Play games.”
"If there were no WeChat and no masturbation, I believe my father would not have passed away."
"So, I'm going to sue them."
The screen switches back to the live broadcast room.
Free novels bring you joy and joy ---> storyskyline.net
"As for this complaint, there is currently no latest result, and WeChat Japan Branch also refused to respond to this."
“Recently, the famous Internet company WeChat launched a small game called Masturbation.”
"Not long after it was launched, it immediately became popular on the entire mobile phone network and became a must-have game for almost all mobile phone netizens.
The users range from children of a few years old to elderly people in their decades, and the game rankings have also become a must-have for all mobile phone netizens.
A hotly discussed topic after dinner.”
"According to a reporter's investigation, in the City of London, a place where the golden-collar class gathers, there are still a lot of users playing the game of masturbating.
So, what is the charming magic of it?"
“We interviewed random people on the street.
A white-collar gentleman in a suit and tie appeared on the screen.
"Hello, may I ask, have you ever masturbated?"
"Played with it."
“Is it fun?”
"It's not bad, a lot of people are playing."
"Then do you want to chase rankings?"
"Absolutely, otherwise it would be very embarrassing."
"Then can you tell me what attracts you most about this game?"
"Of course.
First of all, I think it's fun, simple, and doesn't require downloading and installation.
In addition, it's very interesting, and the real-time ranking is very good.
It can help us interact with friends, which I think is very good."
"Thank you" The screen switched and a beauty appeared.
"Hello, may I ask, have you ever masturbated?"
"I've played it before.
It's a very fun game.
People who haven't played it are all Ultra."
"Do many of your friends play?"
"They play it all.
Many people who used to only play Facebook now use WeChat just to masturbate."
"Then what do you think is the most attractive thing about this game?"
"Well, I think it's very simple and easy to operate.
It just kills time."
“Well thank you” The screen switched again, and a child appeared.
"Hello, kid, have you ever masturbated?"
"Been beaten."
"Do you like to play?"
"Of course, everyone in our class masturbates, but I'm not good at it."
"Why?"
"Well, I have too much homework and no time to practice."
"Oh, okay, thank you, kid."
"You're welcome, bye, Auntie" "goodbye" The scene switched again, this time it was an old man with gray hair.
"Hello, grandpa, do you know how to masturbate?"
"Masturbation" the old man blushed and felt a little embarrassed, "When I was young and strong, I basically masturbated every day.
If I didn't masturbate for a day, I would feel uncomfortable.
Now that I am old and can no longer do it, I just masturbate occasionally."
The female reporter was obviously dumbfounded, "Uh, grandpa, I'm not talking about masturbating, but about masturbating in the WeChat game."
Free novels bring you joy and joy ---> storyskyline.net
"Oh, you talk about games, but also play."
“Is it fun?”
"It's quite fun.
I used to like to fly that kind of plane.
Now that I'm old, I switch to flying this kind of plane.
I think it's very fun."
The old man laughed.
The female reporter was a little crushed.
This old man's interests and hobbies are really special.
Are these two types of masturbation the same?
London, UK, Independent Newspapers Headquarters.
"Jerk off, jerk off, fucking jerk off" Anyone who walks into the football department's offices will immediately hear the shouts.
This is Chief Football Correspondent Glenn Moore locking himself in his office and lashing out at his mother.
In less than a week, masturbating has taken the smartphone world by storm.
From Apple's ios platform to Google's Android platform, almost all users who have WeChat installed will play the game of masturbation.
This has made masturbation become very popular in just one week, sweeping the world.
But the hotter the masturbation got, the more irritable Glenmore became.
because he lost He never would have thought that he didn't need to wait two months at all.
Less than two weeks before the bet, Yang Huan would use hard facts to create a popular game.
More importantly, behind the popularity of this game is a heroic declaration by WeChat.
It is said that WeChat has begun to consider opening up the game center to third-party developers.
It has exceeded 300 million users, which is an irresistible temptation for any game developer.
Glenmore was really surprised.
He never thought that Yang Huan could find a way out of the predicament so quickly.
Moreover, with the popularity of masturbation, WeChat Game Center is bound to launch some new games one after another.
By then, who will believe that WeChat has begun to decline?
Now the entire Internet is hyped.
Yang Huan launched a masturbation machine in three days.
Who would believe that he and his team have exhausted their talents?
The entire market value assessment of WeChat has rebounded strongly, and the valuation is even higher than before, reaching a new peak, because everyone believes that now is the time for WeChat's creativity to explode.
While Glenmore was still pacing back and forth in the office, his cell phone rang.
The caller was the editor-in-chief of a gaming website who had also participated in the bet with Yang Huan.
"Glen, what should we do now?"
The other party has completely lost his idea now.
Masturbation is so popular that it is almost a national game and its momentum is invincible.
Glenmore himself was anxious, but in front of outsiders, he had to act like the independent's chief football reporter.
"What should I do?"
"Now everyone knows that masturbation is very popular.
If you make a game in three days, let alone more than five million downloads, I'm afraid the number of online players at the same time has already exceeded eight figures.
We have already lost."
The other party almost said Roaring.
With so many reporters and more than a dozen newspapers working together, they actually lost to a Chinese.
Shame on you Glenmore's eyelids twitched, "So what?"
"We must think of countermeasures.
Should we really apologize to him in the newspaper?"
Free novels bring you joy and joy ---> storyskyline.net
Glenmore's eyes flashed with a stern expression, "If you lose, you should apologize, but before we apologize, we won't make him feel better."
"What do you want to do?"
Glenmore smiled coldly, "There have been a lot of news about excessive gaming recently, right?"
"yes."
"That's enough, let's use these news to launch a boycott movement on WeChat, put pressure on them, and force Yang Huan to give in.
It's best for both parties to let this matter go."
Glenmore also got angry.
Asking him to apologize is as difficult as asking him to kneel down and admit his mistake.
How could he accept it?
Not to mention apologizing to a Chinese person he has always looked down upon.
In Chinese terms, this move is called surrounding Wei and rescuing Zhao.
The other party was obviously shocked by Glenmore's idea, "I really want to do this."
"Why are you afraid?"
Glenmore said in a cold tone, "It doesn't matter if you are afraid.
Just go and apologize to him in the newspaper."
"This is impossible."
The other party was also annoyed.
How can I apologize in a newspaper?
"Then do what I say.
Let's unite with those colleagues first to denounce WeChat's crimes, try to make the noise as loud as possible and arouse some public anger.
It is best to drive them all out of the UK."
Although I think this is a bit outrageous, it is because I am used to doing this recklessly.
"Okay, then let's contact everyone separately and act together to kill him."
"Okay" Glenmore agreed immediately.
After hanging up the phone, Glenmore's chest burned with rage.
"Hmph, Yang Huan, I will let you know this time that we are not easy to mess with
.
":