I was stunned by Director Cao's words for a moment, and I didn't know what to say to refute.
The self-esteem deep in my heart was gradually being buried by a complicated emotion.
However, at that time, I said inconsistently: "If he hadn't handcuffed me to the interrogation chair, maybe none of this would have happened.
When I said this, my voice was very low, and it was obvious that I had no confidence in my words.
Director Cao sat up straight, shrugged and said in an approachable tone: "Boy, let me tell you a story.
I believe you will have some feelings after listening to this story.
Then he lit a cigarette and put it in his mouth, and said calmly: "It was a cold and long winter night.
Our 54774 unit, which is affiliated to the Jinan Military Region, received orders from our superiors to participate in the self-defense counterattack against Vietnam.
My comrade Xing Zitao and I, like many soldiers, sat in a stuffy tank train car for several days and nights.
At that time, many soldiers were writing suicide notes, and many even cried.
Perhaps because of the sadness, Xing Zitao could not control his emotions and cried.
Maybe you can't understand the fear of going to the battlefield.
Xing Zitao is my fellow soldier and the only soldier I brought out from my hometown.
My position in the army at that time was that of a company commander.
Due to my status, I could not express my emotions at will like ordinary soldiers.
When I saw Xing Zitao also lying in the corner writing a suicide note, his eyes were filled with tears.
At that time, I was young and energetic, and I couldn't get any sand out of my eyes.
Xing Zitao is the soldier I brought out.
He must be as strict with himself as I am.
We are soldiers who bleed without shedding tears.
I was so angry that I raised my hand and slapped him, scolding him until his body was completely bruised.
I vented all my stress on him, but he didn't complain at all.
Later, after our regiment entered Vietnam, my company was named the Assault Company and was ordered to capture a village in Gantang Town.
I clearly remember that it rained very hard that day.
Our assault company was lying in ambush in the woods 1 kilometer away from the village, preparing to launch an attack at night.
At this time, we suddenly found a little girl in her 10s running desperately towards the village.
My keenness on the battlefield made me realize that this might be the spy of the Vietnamese army.
We must have been discovered, and the girl might return to the village to report the news.
The girl was more than ten meters away from us.
She was half-naked and wearing a pair of worn-out patched shorts.
She was covered in mud and didn't even have any shoes.
I knew that once that child ran back to the village, our entire company of more than 100 people would be in danger of being completely wiped out.
I was responsible for the soldiers under me.
I didn't have time to think about it, so I rushed over to catch up with her and pierced her back with a military thorn.
The child fell silently in the rain.
I carried her back to the woods.
The girl stared at me desperately, then vomited blood profusely, and she died painfully in my arms.
Xing Zitao looked at me almost with an angry attitude.
At that moment, I saw something strange in his eyes that I had never seen before.
Our company waited in the woods until late at night, and then began to attack the village.
An entire regiment of Vietnamese troops were scattered by us in their sleep.
And our company only paid the price of one platoon.
Afterwards, Xing Zitao had an opinion about me and thought that I was an inhuman murderous demon.
But at that time, I was overwhelmed by the highest honor and did not explain my original intention to him.
As the war progressed, the military asked us to attack Gaoping, the capital of the province, an important town in North Vietnam.
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My company was responsible for assisting the friendly forces in attacking the city from the flanks.
However, we did not expect that in order to relieve the pressure on Gaoping, the Vietnamese army frantically attacked my location.
The company counterattacked.
There was a roar that shattered the sky and the earth.
I knew it was the sound of the Soviet-30 howitzer, and I shouted loudly: "Get down quickly."
There was a loud bang, and a wave of heat swept over me.
A figure jumped up from my side, pressing me heavily under me, and the splashed mud buried us.
The throbbing pain in my eardrums made me sober up.
I knew that he had saved me, and Xing Zitao, who was lying on top of me, had lost consciousness.
Later, Xing Zitao was injured and returned to the motherland.
During the counterattack of the Vietnamese army, only 23 of our reorganized and strengthened company survived.
We had withdrawn from the Vietnam battlefield with high honor.
Since then, Xing Zitao has not said a word to me.
He applied for discharge after recovering from his injury.
A few years later, I transferred to a full regiment-level position and was assigned to the same unit as Xing Zitao.
However, he was still the same as in the army.
Apart from work contacts, he basically maintained a superior-subordinate relationship with me.
He didn't forgive me until he gave his life to save you.
I wonder what you think after hearing this story At that moment, I was shocked by an invisible force.
I suddenly felt like a villain who did all kinds of evil.
A hero who had made great contributions to the country died indirectly in my hands, and I was a murderer with blood on my hands.
I was speechless for a moment.
Director Cao lit a cigarette, took a deep breath, stared at me and said "Han Bing, I can feel that you are a kind-hearted child.
It is not terrible to make mistakes.
What is terrible is to keep making mistakes without repentance.
You were in a coma in the intensive care unit for 14 days, and you had nightmares every day during these 14 days.
I want to know who the third uncle you are calling is I shuddered and said, "He is my third uncle.
He has been dead for decades.
It was he who killed my second uncle.
Director Cao obviously didn't believe it.
He raised his voice by one decibel: "Han Bing, is there not a word of truth in your mouth?
Your third uncle has been dead for decades.
Have you ever seen him?
How old are you?
The age on your household registration is 18, but your real age is 17.
I just want to tell you that 17 and 18 are the critical point between life and death.
Director Cao saw that I was a little confused and continued to explain: "An 18-year-old is a fully responsible perpetrator and a criminally responsible adult, while a 17-year-old is a minor who is not criminally responsible.
If you continue to speak harshly, no one can save you.
At this time, I clearly knew how funny, stupid and even ridiculous it was to talk to a cadre who had been educated by the party for so many years about me being possessed by my third uncle and killing my second uncle.
Director Cao looked a little excited when he saw that I wasn't talking, and said: "Han Bing, why are you so naive?
If you tell the truth about your crimes, our public security organs will treat you leniently.
You are still young and have a long road ahead.
I'm telling you clearly now, we can bring you to justice even if you don't say a word.
To be honest, I don't want to see Director Xing die inexplicably for a murderer, because it's not worth it. .
Director Cao's words were like a sharp dagger, deeply piercing my fragile heart.
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I closed my eyes and bit my gums and said coldly: "I'm taking my life, I just want a quick death.
Director Cao stood up and took off his sleeves.
In the silent special ward, except for Officer Li who was monitoring me, and the doctor who came to check my blood pressure and body temperature every day, I lay on the bed, motionless like a corpse.
I don't know how my family is doing now.
I live in fear every day.
I am afraid that when I recover from my illness, some policemen will come and tie me up like they did when Wu Guang was shot.
I will be dragged to the People's Square of the city for trial and put on a torture cart to execute me.
I've been waiting for the dawn all day, and in the dawn I've been waiting for the darkness.
On the 47th day, I finally welcomed Director Cao.
He was obviously a little haggard this time.
After entering the ward, he said straight to the point: "I heard from the doctor that your foot injury is recovering quickly.
Maybe you can be discharged from the hospital in a few days.
I have been thinking like this for so many days.
Do you have anything to say.
Hearing what Director Cao said, I felt quite relieved and said: "I killed my second uncle."
Director Cao raised the corners of his mouth and smiled: "It's that simple.
Tell me why you want to kill your second uncle, Han Jianjun.
I try to calm myself down: "Because my second mother scolded my mother, I hit my second mother.
My second uncle hit me with a chair, but my mother blocked me.
When I saw my mother was hurt, I went up to beat my second uncle.
I couldn't hit him, so I picked it up.
I hit him with the ashtray that fell on the ground.
I didn't expect that it would kill him.
I really didn't mean it.
Director Cao held his cheek and waved his hand to signal me to stop and said, "I don't want to hear you talking about these anecdotes.
Why should I scold you and you can beat me?"
I know this from the interview transcripts of your parents and your relatives.
This is not the point.
I want to know how you stood up from the interrogation chair, and what happened from when you were carried into the police car to the hospital.
Tell me in detail.
I recalled carefully: "I saw my dad fainted at that time.
I was very anxious, so I tried my best to break free of the lock on my foot, and I stood up.
Director Cao interrupted me again.
"It's impossible, even for an adult and a professionally trained person, it's impossible for him to slip his ankle into the slot so cleverly.
You are reminiscing carefully.
Did anyone else approach you at that time?
Who put you in the interrogation chair?
I fell into deep thought again and said: "It was the fat police officer who was on duty at that time.
I had a deep influence on him because he beat me in the police car and also in the interrogation chair.
His last name seems to be Cheng.
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