The corners of Hezen's mouth were stretched into a line."
You're so unconfident?"
Gu Qian leaned forward slightly and stared at He Cen, "Little uncle, be fair to yourself and him, even if it's to have fun in time?"
He is an adult, you don't need to think too much about him, Tianling and I have seen it in the past few years, he may still have a lot of immaturity, but he is sincere to you, you use this masochistic way to cold him, don't worry about him really resenting you one day?
When that day comes, you'll be sure you'll be able to stand it?
I won't ask what happened to make you worry about this or that, but what I can be sure of is that Ling Hanbei doesn't know what is wrong with him?
Little uncle, he can be a child with you, and you can be willful with him, you are too restrained. ”“…… It's really ridiculous......"
"No, it's not ridiculous," Gu Qian continued some hot tea and handed it to He Cen, "No one thinks it's ridiculous, only feels distressed and anxious, little uncle, you are strong in everything, only you are too careful emotionally, you are not as happy as yourself." ”The author has something to say: Gu Qian is out of the horse, and one top N is more than ......
It's over, why did you get hooked on Gu Qian again......
There is also an extra oh~~~☆, Chapter 1, Chapter 1, Chapter 1, Fan Wai Qi, Fan Wai Qi, thank you for not being pushed away by me, the temperature difference between morning and evening here is a little big, and as soon as the sun sets, the originally soft cool breeze brings a bit of chill.Gu Jun accompanied Lin Ze out for a walk, He Tianling also took Gu Qian to eat, and He Cen and Ling Hanbei were left in the villa.Ling Hanbei took out a thin velvet blanket from the house and put it on He Cen's lap, and then wanted to help someone massage and relax as usual, but He Cen stopped him and took the person's hand and asked him to sit opposite him.Ling Hanbei felt a little uncertain in his heart, he vaguely felt that after chatting with that Mayor Gu in the afternoon, Uncle He had been a little wrong, and even when he was eating dinner just now, if he hadn't reached out in time, a bowl of fish soup would have almost fallen over on his body.Looking at the flash of panic and pretending to be relaxed in the wolf cub's eyes, He Cen felt very uncomfortable, Xiao Qian was not wrong, he was not only selfish but also ruthless."
Hanbei, let's talk.""
Oh, okay," Ling Hanbei was even more apprehensive in his heart, "What does Uncle He want to talk about?"
”"I haven't cared enough about you this year, you, have you ever blamed me?"
After He Cen finished speaking, he subconsciously pursed his lower lip."
Ah, no," Ling Hanbei hiccuped, "Uncle He, you've always cared about me." ”"Hanbei," Hezen withdrew his hand, "I want to hear the truth." ”Seeing the hand that was released, Ling Hanbei's eyes were anxious, and his heart began to sink, "Uncle He, what do you, what do you want to talk to me about?"
Am I doing something wrong?
I haven't blamed you, never, sometimes I deliberately make you angry not to make you angry, or, I just want you to care more about me, if Uncle He is not happy, I won't be in the future, really I ......"
"Hanbei, it's my problem," He Cen rubbed the velvet blanket on his legs vigorously with both hands, as if to cheer himself up, "I've always been quite insecure, and I don't ......have confidence in you" "Huh?
”Ling Hanbei's eyes widened, his mouth slightly open, and his face was blank and incredulous.He Cen was a little uncomfortable, looked away slightly, sighed briefly, and had a sense of déjà vu, "I still like to think about things by myself, the more I ponder, the more bottomless I become, and then I will compete with myself, and I will not feel ......good about you these days" "No, Uncle He, you are confused about me," Ling Hanbei hesitated, reached out to grab He Cen's hand, He Cen didn't hide, Ling Hanbei's heart was much more steady, and he held it hard, "What's wrong?"
Why are you deliberately cold me?
Uncle He, what did I do to make you think about it so much?
”He Cen curled his fingers and stared at Ling Hanbei's eyes, "I heard what you said to your parents that day. ”"Which day?"
Ling Hanbei was stunned for a moment, and then immediately came to his senses, his expression a little surprised.He Cen lowered his eyebrows, "I didn't mean to listen, I was there at the time, but you didn't see me." ”A year ago, Ling Su was corrected, although his identity could not be publicly rewarded, but he was still given a military medal and the title of martyr internally, for which Ling Hanbei wanted to set up a tombstone for his uncle again, next to his eldest brother and sister-in-law, so as not to make his uncle Ling Su alone.After the monument was erected, Ling Hanbei didn't want He Cen to worship, it would be sad in vain, and he also had a little inhumane thought in his heart, that is, he felt as if he was in front of his uncle Ling Su, and he was a little weak-hearted.He Cen probably also had this idea, and felt that it was not appropriate for the two of them to appear in front of Ling Su at the same time, so he did not insist that he should go to worship in front of Ling Hanbei, but quietly went alone.Ye Luo returned to the roots, the cemetery was in Qingzhou, Ling Su rushed back to his brother and sister-in-law to do the aftermath, because the time was in a hurry and he was afraid that the aftermath would be sloppy, he spent a lot of money to entrust the funeral company to do it, the money was smashed down, everything was according to high specifications, the cemetery was selected as the best feng shui in Qingzhou, and the cemetery was also the best location in the cemetery.Built along the mountain, the mountain is actually not high or steep, it is a stretching hill, the higher the location, the more expensive the price, the Ling family's cemetery is almost in the third row of the penultimate position, and the condescending sight is excellent......
I don't know who needs such a vision?
QAQ~ He Cen walked up slowly step by step, which was really not easy for him, there were about more than a hundred steps, the driver wanted to follow, but he was refused, he had something to say today that he didn't want the second person to hear.Probably subconsciously felt that it was not easy to face Ling Hanbei's parents, and it should be Ling Su who could tolerate him and understand him here, He Cen first bypassed the cemetery of Ling Hanbei's parents, which was closer to him, and went to Ling Su first.The greening of this cemetery is really good, the rows are full of green pines with lush and upright branches and evergreen holly trees in all seasons, it is not Qingming and not the winter solstice, and the cemetery is very quiet.Ling Su has not changed, he is still the smiling soldier brother in his memory, Ling Su in the photo is very young, it should be a photo taken when he has not yet started a secret mission, ID photo, and the smile on his face is very restrained, except for the slightly upturned corners of his lips.At a glance, He Cen's eyes turned red, he stretched out his hand but didn't dare to touch it, just hanging in front of Ling Su's photo, just like the years when they could never go back, he would never touch this person again.The cane couldn't support his sore legs, and He Cen sat on the stone steps under the tombstone, wanting to smoke, but he couldn't find a cigarette all over his body, so he remembered that he usually didn't smoke.His hands were rubbing his knees a little helplessly, and his body was subconsciously tense, and he wanted to lean on the tombstone but was blocked by some distractions in his heart, and he even didn't dare to look directly at Ling Su in the photo."
I'm sorry."
He Cen's extremely soft voice in the entire cemetery still seemed to have an echo, which startled He Cen, and then shook his head and smiled, and after laughing, he buried his face in the palm of his hand, and separated for a while, and the expression on his face was much calmer."
I'm sorry, Ling Su, what I promised you seems to have gone too far, if you are angry, I can understand, but you can't blame me entirely, who made your Ling family too good, hehe, Ling Su, if you really complain about me, when I go down, you can punish it."
It's also your fault, you just left a bear for me, I'm so lonely to live alone," He Cen looked back at the photo, "You just left, leaving me alone and paralyzed......
Ling Su, you really can't blame me for abducting your family's Hanbei, right?
Can you help me intercede with your eldest brother and sister-in-law?
Please don't blame me......
I can also be regarded as a person who has died once, I gave it to you in my last life, I want to be with Hanbei in this life, you can help me......"
The mountain breeze came slowly, the green pines shook slightly, and Ling Su on the tombstone looked at He Cen who was chattering in front of him with a smile.The holly is too lush, and the tombstones are also tall, with an unobstructed view from top to bottom, but Ling Hanbei, who is walking up from the bottom, can't see He Cen, whose figure is covered by the previous row of tombstones, and He Cen doesn't need to get up to see Ling Hanbei walking up the stairs.The inexplicable weakness of heart and the embarrassment that he didn't want to face, He Cen didn't think much about it, so he dodged behind the tombstone on the other side, and the green pine and holly became a natural shielding screen.The two collided on the same day, and it was not a pure coincidence, today is the day of the car accident that year.Ling Hanbei was holding a large bouquet of white lilies in one hand and a black plastic bag in the other, which was bulging and filled with a lot of things.The footsteps stopped not far away, and He Cen regretted his act of hiding a little, but he had already hidden, and now it would be even more embarrassing to go out again, and he leaned against the trunk of the pine tree and didn't understand himself a little.Through the cracks in the trees, He Cen saw Ling Hanbei placing the lilies in front of his parents' tombstones, and then took out a rag and water from the black plastic bag to wipe the mud and dust from the tombstones.Ling Hanbei rubbed very carefully and carefully, and He Cen watched quietly.After wiping it clean, He Cen saw Ling Hanbei stretching out his arms and holding his parents in his arms, and it seemed that he leaned into his parents' arms, this position lasted for about a minute, Ling Hanbei let go of his hand, stood up straight, took two steps back, and suddenly knelt on the ground on both knees.The sound of his knees hitting the ground shook He Cen's heart, as if he had a heart attack, sullen and painful."
Dad, Mom, I'm sorry, I've only come to see you for so long, I guess you don't really want to recognize me as a son, right?"
Ling Hanbei kowtowed three times after speaking, and he didn't get up after kowtowing, and knelt down, "Dad, Mom, I'm not sensible, I've done a lot of things that will make you unhappy, some things I will change, but some can only ask for your understanding, but don't worry, I didn't do anything out of the ordinary, I just fell in love with someone, I liked it very much, he also liked me, he was a very good person." ”He Cen listened quietly, and the mountain wind blew, carrying the fragrance of pine needles."
Dad, Mom, this person I like is a little special, maybe a little different from what you think, hehe, hehe, he is my Uncle He......
Well, you heard it right, it's really Uncle He, isn't it quite unexpected?
”Ling Hanbei looked at the portrait of his parents and was stupidly happy, probably kneeling numbly, and simply sat on the ground, "Dad, it's useless for you to stare at me, I've met such a favorite person after so many years, why do you like it?"
I don't know......
Mom, he gave me a new home, you know?
…… I—I miss you so much," choked in the wind, and Hezen wanted to go over and touch the wolf cub's head, and then accompany him, but in fact he was just sitting there, listening through the tombstone and the holly tree."
You, you're all gone, leaving me alone, I, I'm ignorant of you, are you also responsible?"
Ling Hanbei sniffled vigorously and complained as if he was cheating: "People have raised a son for you, and you are embarrassed not to like him, right?"
”Silly boy, what nonsense?
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He Cengang's heavy heart was amused by these words.There was no sound of talking in the wind, and through the gap, He Cen saw that Ling Hanbei was reaching out and rubbing his mother's photo, and in the not clear vision, he could clearly see that the hand was trembling violently, and He Cen's heart tightened again.The trembling hand slowly moved to the middle of the two photos, and then the five fingers were slightly opened, as if he wanted to cover the two photos under the palm of his hand, Ling Hanbei's forehead lightly pressed against the tombstone, "Dad, Mom, I am sometimes very scared, afraid that one day suddenly another person will come over and say to me, 'Your family has an accident, you are only yourself', I am very scared, you are gone, my uncle is also gone, I will run outside to wander, there are many people who have no home like me, and I am not so uncomfortable......
He, he's not in good health, I like Uncle He......
Mom and Dad, you can take care of me too, okay?
In the next life, if you don't dislike it, and you want me to be your son, I promise to listen to you for everything......
I, I don't want to be so uncomfortable in this life......"
The voice was very soft, the cemetery was quieter, and the whispered words came into Hezen's ears word by word, smashing into his heart, his lips were slightly pale, his chest seemed to be pressed by some heavy object, and there was a bit of a breathless pain.It turned out that it was not only that he was entangled and worried about his body that could not recover 100% and the age difference between his teenage years, this was a hard flaw in the continuation of their relationship, they could not care about it, but it objectively existed, their life may be destined to only half of Ling Hanbei's life......
What about the rest of the years?
He Cen looked at the cane at his hand in disgust, he couldn't even get up and walk out quickly......
His breathing became unsteady, and He Cen took two deep breaths silently, calming his trembling heart.When the voice entered his ears again, he realized that Ling Hanbei had already stood in front of Ling Su's tombstone when he was uneasy.Ling Hanbei brought a bottle of wine to Ling Su, almost all of which were sprinkled in front of the tombstone, and the rich aroma of wine wafted everywhere.In fact, Ling Su doesn't drink much, except for the New Year's holidays, there are times when he is particularly happy......
He Cen's mind was a little confused, but he still subconsciously jumped out of this idea, and when he reacted, he was only bitter and sad.When Ling Hanbei was a child, there were only a handful of days when he saw Ling Su, and the only time he could see it was on special days such as the New Year's Festival, and his uncle would drink probably a deep impression left by the little boy."
Uncle, I didn't hate you before, don't worry about me," Ling Hanbei took a sip of the little wine left in the wine bottle into his mouth, the degree was really a bit high, and he gasped, "Uncle, help me take care of my father and mother......
Well, don't worry about that, that, there's me......
You, uncle, if you meet them there, help me talk about it, hehe, they don't have a chance to upgrade to grandparents, uncle, you are also responsible, you know how good he is......
Forget it, I won't tell you this, I guess you don't like to listen to it, do you want to smoke?
Uncle?
”The sound of lighters, the smell of smoke wafted over.The leaves rolled in the wind, reading each other's stories, silently.The sound of the lighter rang again and again, moving like an hour hand."
Uncle, you are so stupid......"
Ling Hanbei's eyes were red, and he stared at the handsome Ling Su in the photo, "You, how are you ......
It's not fucking worth it for you!
”It's stupid, it's stupid!
He Cen sat there stunned, he didn't know if it was worth it, he thought about it, he didn't think about it, but what if he actually figured it out?
I can't do it all over again......
In a daze, He Cen didn't notice when Ling Hanbei left, nor did he notice the coldness on his face.Ling Hanbei seemed to be still immersed in the accident, He Cen slowly got up with his cane and walked towards the staircase.Maybe he was tired during the day today, or maybe he had been sitting for a long time just now, He Cen's figure was a little shaky, and the green tendons on the back of his hand holding the cane were hidden under the white skin due to the exertion.Suddenly someone under his arm was strongly supported, and He Cen paused without looking back, "I can walk by myself." ”The hand under the arm did not leave, but clenched it tighter, "I can't!
”He Cen didn't move, the figure next to him turned to the front of him, Ling Hanbei held it hard, it hurt a little, He Cen didn't remind, just looked up and was stunned, because he saw Ling Hanbei who was obviously burning with anger in his eyebrows.Ling Hanbei was really angry, it was the first time he wanted to yell at the person in front of him, the reason for such a long time was this!
What does he want to do?
Want to 'fulfill' yourself again in this way?
So that you can make a new choice?
And then he quietly retired from his life and disappeared?
He didn't dare or couldn't bear to roar, he didn't have time to carefully sort out what Uncle He's mood would be when he heard these words that day, but he knew that Uncle He must have felt very guilty and uncomfortable at that time."
Uncle He, did you see my parents that day?"
Ling Hanbei didn't know that it would be this sentence that ran out first, obviously having a stomach of questioning.After asking, both of them were silent and looked at each other."
Nope."
He Cen lowered his gaze and looked at his tightly held arm, maybe there would be bruises tomorrow.“…… Why?
”He Cen raised his head and laughed softly, "Don't you dare to let them see me?"
”"Uncle He......"
"Hanbei, I understand, I ......"
"You listen to me first!"
Ling Hanbei raised his voice and interrupted He Cen, "Those 'understanding' and 'I understand' of yours will be put aside first!"
”Finally yelled at this person, after the roar, Ling Hanbei's mind was not messed up and his heart was steady, it can be described as being smart and clear-sighted, but he was stunned by the roaring person, and he really closed his mouth silently."
I said a lot on the mountain that day, and I guess there were a lot of bastard words, but did I say a word of regret?
I said I'm scared, but who am I scared?
If you like someone, even if you think that this person will leave a day earlier than you, you will be afraid, right?
Why is it always Uncle He who is making decisions alone?
You'd say it's good for me to think about me, but did I say I needed this?
Uncle He, if I really leave you and make a new choice, will you really be able to be at ease and happy?
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If so, I will leave, I will not pester you, and as for how I live in the future, it has nothing to do with you, Uncle He.Uncle He, they are all gone, whether they accept that I like you or not, they are gone, I just want to tell them that I like someone who may not be easy for them to accept, but I just informed them, Uncle He, do I think their thoughts more heavily than you in your heart?
I'm really mad at you, Uncle He, when did you become so stupid?
It's not your average stupidity!
”Hutzen wrinkled his eyebrows and glared at the guy who said he was stupid."
It's stupid!
Am I wrong?
”Ling Hanbei glared back, "I will tell you anything on my mind, what about you?"
It's been so hard for yourself for so long, what's not stupid?
While being with me, you are thinking of sacrificing yourself to fulfill others, you are the Holy Father, there is no one else!
Who do you fulfill?
Why don't you help me find someone else to come out first, so that your self-sacrifice is still worthwhile!
”"I ......"
"What am I?"
Are you willing?
”Ling Hanbei took out his mobile phone, "Shede, help me register now, how about I get married?"
There are so many dating sites, you can do any of them!
Come, Uncle He, you help me think of an introduction, and then help me take a handsome photo and send it up, and then ask you to help check it, maybe you have to ask Uncle He to help me reply to the love letter and ......"
"Hanbei!"
”He Cen stared at the mobile phone in Ling Hanbei's hand, knowing that it was fake, but he was still panicked when he heard this."
Reluctant?"
Ling Hanbei put away his phone and reached out to hold He Cen's hand hanging by his side, "Can you trust me more in the future?"
Uncle He, I will call you 'Uncle He' for the rest of my life, but it doesn't mean that I am a child who will not grow up, you take a closer look at me, I am not the little bastard eight years ago, nor is it the bastard who only cares about myself four years ago, you think about it carefully, after I said that I like you, has it always been me who has been chasing you?
Uncle He, be fair, it's really not easy to be your boyfriend, you're too hard to chase!
”"I'm a cripple, what's so hard to chase......"
He Cen said more and more lightly, and his confidence was a little lacking."
Uncle He's heart," Ling Hanbei stretched out his hand and pointed to the location of He Cen's heart, "It's hard to chase, but I want to chase it for the rest of my life."
Uncle He, you grow up with me, and I grow old with you, and fulfill each other, is it okay?
”He Cen silently clasped Ling Hanbei's hand, "There is really no chance to regret it in the future, I won't give it again." ”"Uncle He, has anyone ever said that you are very verbose?"
Ling Hanbei dragged the person into his arms and hugged him, "Is it Uncle He, you have reached menopause?"
”He Cen was stunned for a moment, and punched him angrily, "Get out!"
”"Okay, I'll get out," Ling Hanbei smiled, stretched out his hand and picked up the person with his knee socket, "Roll the sheets." ”He Cen choked on this, and didn't know what to do with this thick-skinned fellow.Ling Hanbei did not hurriedly walk to the room, but held the person steadily, walking up the stairs step by step, in the quiet villa, there were only footsteps and the sound of heartbeat in the ears, He Cen carefully looked at the face in front of him with hard and clear lines, it was really as the wolf cub said, he was always changing, when He Cen was distracted and contradictory, the youth on the wolf cub's body faded a lot, and it was almost gone.There was a slight tightening force from his shoulders and neck, and Ling Hanbei stopped and looked at He Cen."
Thank you for not being pushed away by me."
The author has something to say: Huh, this article was lost in the computer, and it was written again, QAQ~~ Regardless of whether it is full of dissatisfaction, this article is finally over, I hope the next article can be better, less regrets, thank you for the support of the little angels all the way, the cat will continue to work hard......
Codewords are a joy and a pain!
The next cat wants to write a lighter one.,The psychological portrayal is too difficult to grasp.,It's often written and written that I'm not satisfied.,And then overturn it and start over.,The cat has to write a relaxed story to run the plot to adjust it.,Hehe.