Hell's Kitchen Block, St.
Matthew's Church.One Merlin is saying his final goodbyes to his family, and two Merlins are preparing their last weapons in the mystery house.But there was also a Merlin sitting quietly in the last row of the old church.That's the real Merlin.He sat quietly alone in the last row of chairs, as he had done countless times in the past.He didn't come here to repent, but simply to find peace of mind.Or feel the realization of life and life, in order to make your heart calmer in the upcoming final battle.But he couldn't find it.He couldn't close his eyes and forget what had happened today.In the course of this day, Merlin's world has changed.Just as ordinary people are afraid of change, Merlin once thought he was firm enough.He was no longer afraid of the pressures of life, but it wasn't until fate played a big, malicious joke on him that Merlin found out.He will also feel apprehensive and uneasy about the future.And New York today, and the city now, is not a good day to come to church.Especially in the Hell's Kitchen neighborhood, where the Cybertrons and Hydra had been thrown into disarray, most of the population had taken refuge in nearby shelters.Others went to Queens, where it was said that groups of mutants had built a safe line and housed ordinary people.In short, St.
Matthew's Church is now quiet.Merlin was the only one sitting in the church...
Uh, no, it's two.There is also a nun kneeling in front of the icon and praying."
Is Sister Maggie so sincere?"
Merlin asked softly, "Who is she praying for?"
For herself?
For her already dead husband?
Or for her son?
”"Don't be so mean, Merlin."
A slightly older voice sounded behind Merlin, and the old priest of Hell's Kitchen, Paul, walked into the church with his Bible in his arms, as usual.At a time when the whole city was already in chaos, the priest remained as calm as ever.He acted as if nothing had happened, and he came through the door and stood beside Merlin.He looked at the nuns praying in front of the church, and he said, "Maggie is a silent and unexpressive person, but maybe you should change your impression of her...""
Really?"
Merlin whispered, "She didn't attend her husband's funeral, her son lives a few blocks away, and I've never seen a gift come to me on Matt's birthday...""
How is it possible that you asked me to treat her like a good person?
Father. ”"A man who does not care about his own relatives, hides behind his faith and evades his responsibilities..."
Merlin looked up, he looked at the old priest, and he asked, "On what grounds should I respect her?"
Is it just because she's sincere?
”"ShhhhMerlin. ”The old priest shook his head, he sat down beside Merlin, he made a silent gesture, he said, "The Lord is watching, don't say such things in the church...""
But speaking of which, why are you here?
Shouldn't you go and spend time with your family?
”Father Paul asked, "Did you send them to safety?"
”"They're going to be safe."
Merlin leaned back in his chair and said, "And I'm with them...
Talk to me, Father, I'm in a bad mood right now. ”"I can see it."
The old priest laughed, put the Bible in his hand aside, and said, "You are not usually a person who likes to pick thorns, judging by your expression, you must have encountered something very troublesome?"
About what?
Job?
Or is it the disaster that is happening in the city?
”"Both."
Merlin said in a low tone, "Father, what about me, I used to be very simple, always thinking that I was doing good...""
You are indeed doing good.""
In terms of your help to the children in the orphanage, there will be no better people in this neighborhood than you," said the priest. ”"Listen to me, Father."
Merlin smiled and shook his head, he looked at the icon in the church in front of him, and said, "But just a few hours ago, I suddenly knew that I was actually a marionette who always wanted to get the job done quickly, and that there was always someone behind it...
I hate that feeling."
Actually, I've been aware of this for a long time."
Merlin pulled out a cigarette, but didn't light it.He put the cigarette under his nose and sniffed it, and he said, "I realized early on, those disasters...""
The ones on the news, or the ones that you don't know, but the ones that really happened, those disasters, are more or less related to me...""
Do you believe in God?
Father. ”Merlin's question made the corners of Father Paul's eyes twitch.He seriously doubted that Merlin had drunk too much, and actually went to church and asked a man who had been a priest for decades if he believed in God.But looking into Merlin's serious eyes, the priest realized that Merlin's question had a deeper meaning.He thought for a moment, then said, "Of course, I believe in God," "but I don't put everything on my God, faith is my own business, just as my life is my own." ”"I thank God for giving me life, but I also know that I need to live my life, whether it is happiness or pain, I need to bear it myself.""
Well, it's sane."
Merlin nodded, he pointed to the sky, and he said, "My troubles come from the gods who dwell in the sky...""
Don't look at me like that, Father, come on, don't pretend, we've known each other for almost 20 years, and I don't believe you can't feel my abnormality..."
The surprised expression on Father Paul's face beside him changed for a moment, and after a few seconds, the priest coughed.He relieved himself and said to Merlin, "Well, you go on, what happened to you with those 'gods'?"
”"They're playing a game."
Merlin said in a calm tone: "There are always chess pieces in the game, there must always be bets, the world is their chessboard, and there is only one chess piece...""
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Do you see what I mean?
Father, I'm not bragging. ”Merlin had a smile on his face as he said to the priest: "This disaster, all this chaos, all those pasts, they have used challenges again and again to shape a destiny, and they have a lot of fun, but they don't care about the feelings of the children of destiny. ”"And now, that fate has forked in.""
Select...
Choices bring results, but of all the choices, none of them satisfied me, so I was thinking...
Is it to make my own choice. ”"Do I want to resist?"
The priest listened to Merlin's words with a frown, and to be honest, what Merlin said seemed a little strange to him.The old priest thought for a few seconds, and then he said to Merlin, "I can't answer you, because if this choice is really so important, I don't think I should influence you." ”"Okay."
Merlin sighed, and he said, "Then you should be a listener." ”"I'm wondering now, in my previous life, every time I chose to accept an assignment, did I ever choose to say no?
Do I have the right to refuse?
”"Have I ever calmed down and thought about it, or asked myself, who and for what purpose had I be asked to do this and that—" Merlin looked at his outstretched hand, at the white fingers.He could even smell the smell of blood emanating from his fingers, strong, drowning in everything...
"Now that I think about it," he said, "I understand that everything I have done for my superiors, or for my former 'friends', for this world, has brought the world one step closer to turmoil...""
That's not what I think...
Peace, order, beauty, that's not. ”"It's just an illusion implanted in my head by the shadow behind me...""
It's a vain thing, it never appears through my hands.The harder I tried, the more I got caught up in it, like chasing the sun that could never reach me. ”The old priest beside Merlin listened quietly.He had understood that Merlin wasn't here to find answers.He has already made his choice.All he needed was a listener.Father Paul had a good sense of Merlin, they had known each other for almost 20 years, and Merlin was his friend.Whatever Merlin had to do, the priest felt that he might not be able to help.But he can at least listen to Merlin talk about the troubles and entanglements in his heart here, so that Merlin can face everything that is about to happen with a calmer mind.As a friend, that's all he can do."
The villains in the city, the villains, and the masters behind them, they're just a bunch of insignificant...
Child. ”Merlin frowned and came up with a suitable adjective, and he said to the priest: "We can say that they are hungry for attention, they want to dominate public opinion with fear, they don't care about anything, but they care a lot about what other people think or feel. ”"That's the reason for their existence, like a seemingly powerful shadow, it only takes a light to make them completely disappear, and they are never a big problem.""
But it's a pity that those...
Those gods don't care!
”"They don't care what anyone in this world thinks or feels.""
And in my current experience, even if these two things appear in their minds, they never last long, this disrespect for life, to be honest, makes me very...""
Anger."
Merlin whispered, "After all, that's what I've been guarding for the past ten years, just trampled on by them, stepped into the mud, torn apart, just because they want me to do what they want." ”"Alas, I may have learned to be more ruthless, but not all of us have the privilege of seeing their origins," he said to the priest beside him, "a world is shaped because I need to live, to be born, to grow...
This world exists because of me, Father. ”"I was born with a heavy fate and death disaster unimaginable to ordinary people, and my life is also atoning for it.""
I want to keep going and do more to lessen my guilt...
Continue to deceive yourself. ”"I may be a coward, only by living in lies can I get closer to my ideals."
Merlin closed his eyes and summed it up like a dream: "But those sins are too many...", Father Paul listened quietly, but when he heard Merlin's last reluctant summary, he could not help himself.The old priest reached out and patted Merlin's arm, and he said to Merlin, "I can't imagine what you're going through, Merlin, and I can't bring myself into your vision to see all this, I'm just an ordinary person after all." ”"But in my faith, I feel like my God created everyone for a purpose, you know?""
He wants you and me to have a place for you and me in this world..."
Merlin glanced at Father Shen, he didn't want to argue, but after a few seconds, he said, "So, why should your God put demons in my heart?"
”"Why can I feel now, in my soul, in my heart, that there is a devil who desperately wants to rush out?""
It's howling and urging me to destroy everything with brutality and simplicity, and then use my hands to rebuild the perfect world within itself?"
Merlin's tone became intense, and he asked rhetorically, "Those two voices have been pestering, do you understand?"
”"One that makes me embrace the power that can help me, and use the power of power to undo it all; The other is asking me to destroy the things that make me feel bad about me...
Oh yes, there's a third voice!
”Merlin clenched his fists and said, "The third voice told me to quit!"
”"Like a coward, at the cost of his own grievances, to get everything back on track...""
Why?
Explain, Father, why do those voices appear, and why do I feel hesitant?
”The priest was not angry.Instead, he patiently explained to Merlin: "Perhaps, those demons are just trying to awaken your human side, or maybe it is the plan of the gods, which is the real struggle in your heart, so that you can realize your true self!"
”"You know what?
Merlin. ”"There is only one thing that can make people truly recognize themselves, and that is the fear that the devil is about to catch up with him, the fear and consternation in the face of disaster, and the entanglement and hesitation when making difficult choices.""
Perhaps, they are giving you demons and pressures, not just to make you make a choice, but to make you more aware of your role in this world," said the priest. ”"You're going to be a ruler?
Be a destroyer?
Be an escapist?
”Father Paul stretched out his hand and nodded to Merlin's heart, saying, "Follow your own will and do a...
Well, rebels?
”"Or rather, the one who broke the shackles!
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Liberators who give freedom to all, freedom to themselves, freedom to this world?
”Merlin's eyes twitched.He looked at Father Paul, he pursed his lips, then shook his head, and said, "I don't think those guys would be so kind...
But your explanation is kind of interesting. ”"Well, I'll admit, I'm actually a little scared."
Merlin's expression relaxed, and he said to the priest, "I'm afraid I'll never go back...
I'm more worried that everyone will forget me so quietly, like something that once happened. ”"After all, I'm going to do something that no one has ever done.""
Hmm...
If only it were fear. ”The priest blinked, and he said to Merlin, "I may be able to help, but do you still have time?"
Listen to an old man tell a story from the past. ”"When?"
Sensing the progress of what was going on in the house and in the mystery house, Merlin said to the priest, "There are still a few more. ”"Say, Father, I'll listen
.
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