"Like the origin of all super-transhumans, my origin story begins with a bare ass and unprecedented pain.""
How did I get into this vat full of potions and pipes, you might ask?
Even if these needles go from my ass all the way to my mouth?
Actually, I volunteered. ”"The pain of terminal cancer, like this damn Canadian experiment, gave me the thrill of sitting on a dog sled and hurtling towards death.As for what kind of dog it is?
It wasn't Alaska anyway, because they were always in white coats, going up and down by the tub, pointing at my fairly intact eyeballs and some specialty. ”"Many people are unrecognizable in the dark, and when the pain is like a piranha burrowing into the intestines, you will be like me, having a hard time seeing anything.""
But I'm still so friendly, and in the time of who knows how long, I've made a few new friends, even though they probably don't even know my name.""
Francis, whenever he appears, wears his sharkskin swimsuit-like black bodysuit, his chin is as wide as his forehead, and his brain is probably square.The good news is that he's a total pervert, and I like perverted people, they're always very honest.The bad news is that he seems to have the final say, and there are probably more than a hundred patients with whom I have been treated, and half of them have been tortured to death. ”"Professor Thornton, the bald scientist, always looked at my Tintin with envy, and I guess he was psychopathic because of his incompetence, so he became the chief engineer of the experimental project.""
Dr.
Krumos, who looks like a Russian, has a big beard and thick hair, and wears a pair of funny round glasses, and every time I am going to be toyed to death by the two mentioned above, he will save me and make sure that I can be grass for longer.""
Miss He, I don't know what she does, but she is convex and backward, and her short hair is also very suitable for a beautiful face, and whenever she twists her small waist and passes by my glass tank, I will stiffen slightly to show respect.""
Of course, in addition to these people, there are countless good people in this underground warehouse-like base, who are like background characters in Bollywood musical dramas, singing and dancing every day with electric batons and guns.Hundreds of people have contributed to this experimental medical technology, including the one who burned the crematorium, who is probably the hardest. ”"If this is really some kind of medical experiment, I will probably be moved, but unfortunately this is not a damn weapon program, the devil knows what it is, it's not a good thing anyway, they implanted us with a self-healing factor from 'Wolverine', intending to turn us patients into brainwashed super weapons.""
Maybe some of you will ask, handsome little Wade, how do you know this?""
Little fool, of course someone in the audience told me!
Okay, no, the long period of pain has greatly increased my resistance to pain and anesthetics, and I pretended to be asleep when I heard Professor Thornton say that my cancer cells had formed a balance with the self-healing factor, and I was ready to go home, do you think I would scare them if I suddenly jumped out of the sink?
”Wade's inner drama is super rich, if these contents were comics, they should be able to draw a dozen pages, cancer cells and self-healing factors completely destroyed his brain, but when it made him insane, it also opened a new door for him.He is no longer afraid of being lonely in the future, and there are countless people in his mind who are communicating with him through things like barrage, just like the live webcasts he has watched, which is very cool.Now he's going to show the old iron a mermaid out of the water, and see if he can have some fun with the scientists around him.Some moats rewarded gifts in the live broadcast room, and Wade saw that the popularity value column had risen a lot, so naturally he would not disappoint everyone.For the sake of the show, he specially imitated the movements of zombies, and raised his arms from the water tank with a whizz, just like a corpse.Sure enough, the white coats who were still manipulating the instruments and equipment around them all took a few steps back, and some people began to call the security guards heartbreakingly.Wade was about to jump out of the sink full of green water, but he had been lying down noticeably longer than he thought he would, and his legs, which had been inactive for a long time, were not very responsive, so he tripped over the edge of the sink and flipped upside down.Luckily, there was a large pipe in the chrysanthemum that could be used as a traction, and when he was about to hit the ground with his face, the cable provided some tension and gave him a chance to hold the ground with his hands.The price is a bit of a prolapse, but that's only a minor issue."
Hey guys, I think I'm sick and ready to be discharged, I'm as healthy as Superman, and I'm still not afraid of Kryptonite."
He ripped off the 'tail' behind him, and a unique pleasure made him roll his eyes, shiver for a moment, and then smile and say hello to the people around him."
Vomit !!"
If he didn't smile, the people in the neighborhood could barely hold on, but when this smile appeared on that face, everyone felt that their eyes were black and they vomited until they fell unconscious."
Huh?
Did I make you nervous until you got pregnant?
I'm not a superstar, so it's strange how I feel a little cold on the top of my head. ”He was still chattering, but after touching the air, he felt a little cold on his head, and when he reached out to touch it, not only did he not touch his hair, but he also took a piece of rotten scalp like a piece of soaked toilet paper from the glass.But he didn't panic at all, but carefully looked at his scalp: "I'm gone, where is my hair?!"
”And at this moment, Wade saw his face from the monitor on the side, at first he couldn't believe that this carrion-like monster was him, but when the person in the video made the same expression as him, he finally accepted the reality.They experimented on him, supervised his chrysanthemums, and he could bear it.But "you shouldn't have ruined my handsome face!!
”With a roar of rage, he grabbed the tray rack and prepared to kill them all, but the security guards arrived, and they opened fire on Wade with shotguns.In the blink of an eye, he was shot several times, and even his fingers were broken several times.However, the speed of his self-healing was unexpected, even much faster than Wolverine, and although it was a little painful, he found that he was fine.His brain suddenly became active again, showing a cheap smile, wiping the blood and potions on his body, and his mouth seemed to be uncontrollable: "Wow, although I have a lot of water, shouldn't you be gentle when you come up?"
Don't use a guy with such a thick caliber!
”After saying that, he was amused by his own jokes, so much so that the stainless steel shelf in his hand could not hold it steadily.His mind was in chaos, and he wanted to cry, but he showed that he was laughing, so that he couldn't even breathe.At this time, the security guards arrived with flamethrowers and W bazookas, and after dragging the unconscious scientists on the ground to retreat, they bombarded Wade indiscriminately, and a few minutes later, the experimenters with fire extinguishers fished out some crushed human-shaped coke from the fire.Wade is still not dead."
Is this a success?
The ability to heal itself seems to have reached the requirements. ”Krumos, who had just arrived, whispered to Professor Thornton beside him, but the professor was actually just a working boy and could only look at Francis on the other side, who was the boss of the laboratory.I saw that the square-faced man was leaning against the wall with his hand, constantly wiping the vomit on the side of his mouth with a handkerchief, and roared angrily: "It must have failed!"
He's so ugly!
How can I use this kind of weapon?!
Dispose of it!
Wade, who had been roasted to crispy fried chicken, struggled to raise his middle finger as he was dragged away by the Bollywood dancers, and cursed intermittently in a weak voice: "I'll do it, you guys, mother." ”