Han Xi, do you like the sea, I like it very much, and I have become a big fish even in my dreams.The faint light shone straight through the dense green shade, and the morning when she woke up was shrouded in a thin layer of muttering, and a small drop of dew rested on her nose, and she muttered a small mouth and laughed softly.I couldn't react to look at her, but she grabbed the schoolbag strap on her shoulder, and jumped off the park bench at once, after the "click" sound fell, she opened her hands and squirmed very funny, and said seriously, Han Xi, look, it should be like this when you step on a windsurfing board at sea, ah, ah, it's great, it's great.Stupid, how cool are those people on the windsurfing board, how cool are they, like a little snake, writhing around ugly to death I pursed my mouth in disgust, and said to her in a childish voice.She was also good-natured and not angry, she came over and hugged my arm, pointed to the sky and said to me, The sky on the sea must be more beautiful I said Shang Shang, do you like the sea so much I sighed helplessly and asked her.She blinked her eyes gently, her round little face was full of confusion, and it took a long, long time before she said, Han Xi, you said that you dreamed that you had become a big fish in the sea, do you like this I hummed for a long time, and finally said uncertainly, it should be yes, yes, you just like the sea, and the more you say it, the more you say it, the more you say it, the more sure it is, even she was stunned by me on the spot, and then she smiled shallowly, I like it very much, I like everything about the sea.At that time, I looked at her, and I looked at it as if I saw the distant sea, the waves pushing the reef, the golden sand under the blue sky, and the bright flowers growing on the isolated islands of the sea.The chirping of the seagulls, the big fish in the deep sea, the small shell fish pushed up the beach by the waves, everything is so beautiful and blue.The small body carries the joy of the heart, standing on the sea, smelling the fishy smell hidden in the sea breeze, everything is a blue sound.I stared at her blankly, but I seemed to see the ocean in her eyes, which I imagined to be more beautiful and blue.I never dreamed of becoming a big fish.She said.Who is she, I picked up the photo she had placed on the bedside table with one hand, and I couldn't help but feel a little jealous when I saw her with the girl I didn't know.I am such a person, jealous and selfish.She smiled happily and said to me, "What about me, good friend, I pursed my lips dissatisfied, I was extremely unhappy.Also.She said.I snorted coldly and said nothing in anger.Her name is Xiang Qingtian, she is my best friend in my hometown, don't be angry Han Xi.She grinned and shook my hand, a little flattering.It's best I'm not happy anymore.I say.Han Xi is also the best, I like Han Xi the most After listening to her words, I laughed happily, but when I saw her, I said again, Qingtian is very timid and inferior, if I leave, I guess she won't dare to make friends, and I'm really worried about her, but Han Xi, you said, will we have a chance to meet her, do you think you write a novel, I looked at her with disdain, but if I really meet, I will bully her fiercely Haha Han Xi, if you really meet her, promise me not to bully her, okay, Qingtian is a good boy.Child, you are not a fucking child now, what kind of adult are you pretending to be an adult I teased her funny, and then said seriously, don't worry, she is your friend and my friend, I won't bully her, yes, Han Xi is the best.I think if she really bumps into her, Han Xi will definitely recognize her in the same way, and she will become very good friends with Qingtian, she said.That year, the spring breeze was blue, the sun was shining and the sky was still sunny, and even the old man who bought the rock sugar gourd at the mouth of the alley would smile wrinkled in the sun, and then greeted the pedestrians on the road.You die in the far and boundless sea, follow the pace of the waves hitting the sunset, and then slowly turn into the big fish of your dreams in the afterglow.You say that the fish memory is only seven seconds, you say that the birds dare not touch the horizon, you say that Cinderella is unhappy, you say that you will spend your life memories to chase the blue sky of the sunset by the sea.Like a scavenger in the desert, we pick up and pick up and lose everything.God really can't get enough of the excitement, a joke can separate us forever, and a sentence can tie all of our relationships together dramatically, trapped in an infinite loop and tortured to death.I met Xiang Qingtian later, and as you said, I recognized her at a glance, and I didn't touch her as I promised you that year, no matter how much I hated her.I like a clean girl like her, much better than me, but I hate her weak and submissive appearance, and I hate that she is also standing on the tip of rebellion like me, more and more like me.You won't know, how much I hope she is like you in my memory, clean and innocent, not with the world.But my dear, it's hard to change the way I look, how can I be impressed by Xiang Qingtian's resoluteness, we like the same person.Because of you, I chose to regress and not fight, just because of your sentence not to bully her.I miss you so much, I miss you as soon as I see Xiang Qingtian, and I feel more and more painful when I see her becoming more and more rebellious, because this makes me not even have a chance to fantasize about her as you.It's just that I'm also sad, sad that the person I love is with her, and I can't beat her and bully her.Dear Shang Shang, did you foresee the future a long time ago, so you said such things to force me to compromise I also like it, like it, like it Han Xi, I like you the most, so you must be good.I'm not good at all, Shang Shang.When I woke up, I was still sitting on the floor, I rubbed my eyes but touched a hand of tears, I really didn't expect that I would cry even in my dreams, I was really hypocritical.I looked at my room blankly, and suddenly felt strange and cold, sure enough, once I got used to being accompanied, I became more and more afraid of being lonely and lonely, this is the first time I fell asleep on the floor, I can't remember it, it seems that after the relationship with Gu Xi cooled down, I slept directly on the floor from night to dawn, and then from dawn to night, many times, when I think of this cold home, at night, there is no one else but myself, just thinking about it makes me feel extremely sad.Su Hanxi, do you deserve it, you deserve it for so many years, bullying and domineering, now thirty years in Hedong and thirty years in Hexi, change the way it is your turn to deserve it, the more I think about it, the more sad I become, I suddenly felt a little suffocated, and the drug addiction that was provoked came up at an inopportune time, I grabbed my hair in pain, lit a cigarette, and burned the mark on my left arm fiercely.I frowned tightly and looked at my arm with a pale face, the tooth marks on which were slowly hidden from the burns of the cigarette butt.There, a small five-petal flower was scalded, beautiful and shocking.It's like a tattoo on the body, just like that, it grows here and is engraved in the heart.Beautiful flowers, it smiled shallowly, but laughed out of tears."
Gu Xi, I miss you so much."
I feebly removed the cigarette butt, rested my head against the cold wall, and muttered softly.The only remaining sobriety was slowly numbed in pain, and only a lone shadow stood in the light, trembling and swaying.After relieving myself, I suddenly felt a little hungry, and when I walked downstairs listlessly, I saw Su Zhiyang sitting on the sofa, holding a magazine and reading it with a serious face, and from time to time I asked Aunt An on the side for advice."
Aunt An, you see how this place is held, even if it rains suddenly, it will not have much impact on this venue" I hooked my mouth mockingly, and walked down slowly holding on to the railing, with a touch of disdain in my tone: "Yo, Su Zhiyang, you are getting married, are you choosing the venue, have you chosen the wedding photos at that time, and where is the bride-to-be now?"
he raised his head and looked at me coldly, and asked Aunt An's opinion again.Aunt An looked at me complicatedly, and said without words: "Master, Miss She" "Ignore him." ”"Why, Su Zhiyang, you don't plan to invite me, then you're too boring, don't you have to invite me to have a look, I'm a bridesmaid or something, it's not bad," I said mockingly."
You're going, you can just treat me well and don't stab me," he angrily closed the magazine, obviously upset that I was deliberately raising the bar with him.I chuckled and walked to the sofa and sat down, lazily playing with my nails, and asked slowly: "Got married, right, have you already bought a house outside, when will you move out and not come back?"
"Su Hanxi, what do you mean" I looked at him coldly, and chuckled again, and my words were more tough at this time: "It's okay to get married, you are not allowed to enter this house, and you are not allowed to get a certificate for me Su Hanxi, but it's not so casual that you can just recognize a random person outside" "You are simply unreasonable" Looking at Su Zhiyang's angry appearance, I didn't have the pleasure I had in the past at this time.I will never allow another name to appear in the household register, everything in my mother has been replaced with wedding supplies, not to mention that this woman who is going to become my stepmother is just an existence that is not much older than me.Looking at Su Zhiyang's gloomy face, I raised the corners of my mouth coldly, but my heart became even more bitter.Is it true that as long as I compromise, I will really become the most superfluous person I can never imagine, and after I began to get used to companionship, I became more and more afraid of being alone and superfluous."
Su Zhiyang, I mean seriously, I won't let that woman enter the door when I die, and I won't let you get the certificate with peace of mind."
I say
.
: