Later, I moved back to the house rented by Gu Xi, and day after day, I gradually lost my temperature and enthusiasm.Gu Xi spent more time with me, and I didn't know how he handled Xiang Qingtian's affairs, I only knew that Xiang Qingtian hadn't appeared by his side for a long time, but it couldn't be said that they had lost contact.And the relationship between me and Gu Xi has also returned to a sharp beginning in repetition, I am still sensitive to this emotion, and Gu Xi is also bored and avoided in my sensitivity and small heart.It seems that nothing has changed, and our relationship has deteriorated to the point where it needs to be carefully run-in and back down.We will quarrel on the spot because of a somewhat sensitive matter, or we may fall into the silence of the Cold War, and it is difficult for someone to bow their heads first.Gu Xi is still the same crybaby he was at the beginning, and he has always protected me when he says he wants to protect me, but the difference is that he no longer cries easily when he has no candy, and he only dares to cry unscrupulously when he is drunk.He likes me, so he's going to be strong, he's always telling himself.But let the cold wind of those years sharpen our edges and corners in time, disguised and resolute.He didn't grow up, and he was a crybaby like he used to be, protecting me all the time.But he still has to pretend to be strong and brave, because in his heart, if he cries, he can't protect his beloved girl.It's just Gu Xi, we who haven't passed twenty years have always loved too bitterly and hard.I also never thought that before twenty, I already had children with you."
Then Han, are you here again today and what's the matter" Shu was still as cold as ever, there was no personal emotion on her rigorous face, she was different from ordinary people in her seriousness about her work.I glanced at the bundle in silence, but did not rush to speak, and when my eyes fell on the tea that had been prepared on the table, I hesitated for a moment but picked it up, and took a sip without changing my face.It was not as cold as I imagined, it was a little warm, and the moment it fell into my stomach warmed my whole body."
Shu, what should I do" Putting down the water glass, I clenched my fists and looked at Shu helplessly, and the moment I said it, tears rolled down instantly, and a crystal tear bloomed on the back of my cold hand.Shu frowned slightly, pulled out a piece of paper, got up and walked towards me, wiped away my tears, rarely let go of his attitude towards work, hugged me and said to me softly: "Han, for the sake of him in his stomach, you must also pay attention to your body, don't be sad."
Shu patted me on the shoulder helplessly, returned to the chair and said, "Han, he likes you, what are you so worried about" I held back my tears, clutched the dead corner, and forced myself to speak: "I don't know, Shu, I really don't know."
I was scared of him leaving, I was really scared of losing him.There are so many women around him, so he also has a lot of choices, and I'm really afraid that he will abandon me I can't do without him. ”"Shu, I really like him so much, I like him the most, I can't imagine that one day I will lose him, that feeling I think will definitely suffocate me to the point of wanting to die, without him, I really don't know what I'm living for" Shu sighed slightly, stroked his long black hair, and said: "Han, you like him so much, why don't you tell him Seriously, if a relationship is maintained by suspicion, sensitivity, caution and memories, it is not only you who are tormented.""
You're about to show your pregnancy, find a regular hospital to check it out, you can't keep it hidden.He is the father of the child, and he is entitled to know about it. ”Shu looked straight at me and said, "Regarding your family, find an opportunity to tell Uncle Su, as a parent, he is also qualified to know about this." ”My eyes widened in fear, and the nails in my palms ached, and I said bitterly: "You can't bind it, you can't tell him, I don't want to, I don't want to use this matter to restrict his freedom, I love him so much, I don't want him to be embarrassed and miserable for this kind of thing, I really don't want to do it at all.""
Shu, he is so good to me, I like him so much, I really can't look at him embarrassed and uncomfortable, and I don't want to use this to restrain him at all, he will be uncomfortable" I gritted my teeth tightly, holding back the tears that were already rolling in my eyes."
Then Han, aren't you going to ask for him" I stared blankly at the reflection in the water glass, and I could clearly see my face that turned pale in an instant, and even the biting lower lip slowly loosened, and it became bloodless in an instant.Don't I want him, do I really don't want him, do I really don't want Gu Xi's children, I like him so much, I like him so much because I like Gu Xi, for him, I quit smoking and drinking, I don't stay up late, I pay attention to diet and safety every day, don't wear jeans and abandon my favorite high heels, just for his safety.So now, in order not to restrict Gu Xi's freedom, do I want to let go of him I like me and Gu Xi's child so much, I even smiled and bent my eyes after waking up from a dream, and now I really want to abandon this child I can't do it I love this child so much, I like him so much, let me give up It's really difficult for me to do it.But I can do it again, looking at Gu Xi embarrassed, forcibly holding the child and coercing him to restrain him, is he just a crybaby who likes me, he is just liking me so simply, do I really do it, I only hate, before twenty, I already have a child.I hate that the years are quiet and don't send me blessings, I hate my powerlessness, living such a mess.I like them more than I like myself, but what should I do?"
You can't hurt them with impunity just because they love you.Gu Beixi really likes you, and Uncle Su only loves you as a daughter, how can they be willing to make you sad if they love you so much Tell them what you really think, don't be uncomfortable alone. ”Shu said, "After so many years of willfulness, it's time to find a shoulder to cry well, and if you cry, you will grow up."
You have a father, a lover, and a child who will be filial to you in the future. ”Shu stood up and gave me a cup of hot water again, patted me on the shoulder helplessly and walked towards the door of the consultation room, and at the moment she opened the door, she stopped again and said, "Han, don't push those likes for you so far, you will really not be able to find it when you grow up in the future."
The moment I walked out of the counseling room, the tears that I had been holding back for a long time finally burst like a bank, and I felt as if I was about to fall to the ground, and the moment I reached out to cover my lower abdomen, I almost collapsed.Before I was twenty, I already had a child, and in this warm position, there was a fresh life breathing.In the future, he will be born, he will be able to babble, he will be able to call his parents, he will learn to walk and run, and all the gossip will be in this unpredictable change, and everything will be so dramatic.I don't care about other people's eyes and abuse, even if I say that I don't have a chaotic private life, I always believe that I will talk about a serious and worthy love, I will have a vigorous marriage, and I am the most smiling time in my life on the marriage certificate and wedding photo.I will have a family, a father who loves me, a lover who loves me, and we will have a child in the future.Ten miles of spring breeze and thousands of miles of coast, we will have a home, and we will love each other until we grow old.It's just that I never dared to think that I would get pregnant out of wedlock.Sophomore, before I was in my twenties, I already had children.I came to a regular hospital for a check-up in a daze, and when I got the list confirming my pregnancy, I felt that all the light in my world was dark."
You live in the world of flowers, so you can copy the thoughtfulness of three wives and four concubines casually, and you have pasted a few of them" I looked at the bustling street market in a daze, listening to the music in the unknown store, and suddenly felt that this city, which had given birth to me for more than ten years, had become extremely strange at this moment."
You're not beside me, the boiling water has cooled into a cold cold, and you've been a little busy lately, tired and tired face" With the sound of glass breaking around me, I hurriedly looked towards the source of the sound, but saw a familiar figure already facing the door of the store, and scolded like a shrew: "Fuck you, and you're not next to me, what the fucking song is playing, what's wrong with my junior, I don't allow the mistress to appear, he ran back to find his girlfriend, do I have a way, I, I like him so much, why can't he see it, I'm a third party, I just like him" "Neurotic, what are you crazy about coming to us, you deserve no one to love you, only when you are a junior, what use are you besides seducing men, you" I hurriedly pushed away the crowd of onlookers and squeezed in, pulled her over, handed the clerk a few red tickets, and kept apologizing: "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, my friend, she got drunk and went crazy again, I'm really sorry.""
What are we going to do here, nervous," the clerk took the money and gave us a disgusted look, turned around and walked into the store.Seeing the clerk walk in, I wanted to pull Xiang Qingtian and leave quickly, but I didn't want her to shake off my hand and scolded me: "Fuck Su Hanxi, who is friends with you, don't you hurt me like this, do you say where are you good, why do you want him to be so sad Why do you like you so much, I'm a junior, what's the matter, I just like him too much?"
It's the only fucking me who treats you as a friend, and you still treat me as an enemy to rob my boyfriend, I said Xiang Qingtian, you are not ashamed, you are a junior, you are still proud, ha, you are too twisted and perverted, right" I looked at Xiang Qingtian coldly, grabbed her hand and walked towards the side of the street to stop the car."
I'm twisted and perverted, I'm not a junior, it's not because you, if you don't rob me of the north seat, will I become a junior, Su Hanxi, don't expect me to pay back the money you compensated" "Do you think I lack those few dollars, I robbed you later, it's obviously you who grabbed my boyfriend later, big sister, don't talk nonsense when you're drunk, you" "So Su Hanxi, you hate it to death, it's good-looking and a loser, and you robbed my north seat, so I hate you" I stuffed Xiang Qingtian into the taxi, got into the car and closed the door, After telling the driver the address, he sneered and said to Xiang Qingtian: "Xiang Qingtian, I really didn't expect you to be so unreasonable when you got drunk, you hate me very much, then I'll sell you
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