#第一百四十章 - A place like water and sunshine.Shen Dayye opened his eyes vaguely.It was the living room of her home in Washington, D.C., which had been uninhabited for nearly a decade and had last been cleaned two years ago, leaving the floor covered in a thick, whitish coat of dust.And Chen Xiaozhi was lying beside her, still wearing the coat, as if he was not very comfortable from the sun, and rubbed his eyes unconsciously.Shen Dayye: "......"
Shen Dayye immediately turned over and pushed him hard.Chen Xiaozhi didn't seem to be sleeping, he woke up immediately, and the two looked at each other."............"
The two didn't say a word, just looked at each other dumbfounded.Shen Dayye was extremely difficult and said, "......
You ......"
Chen Xiaozhi immediately stopped her inquiry: "That's right." ”“…… So," Shen Dayye said stupidly, "we're not ......" - so we're not dreaming?
She wanted to ask.But it doesn't seem to be.The past night cannot be defined by the word "dream", what dream can make the two of them appear at the same time?
In fact, it is more like a shoal between dream and reality, where the other shore is connected to this shore, so when you open your eyes, you can't even tell the difference between dream and reality."
I don't know."
Chen Xiaozhi said honestly, and then stretched out his arms again: "Come and hug." ”Shen Dayye didn't even think about it, and went directly into his arms.The young man's arms were full of his breath, which was reassuring.The winter sun was warm and ironing between the two of them, and they lay quietly on the dusty ground, the ends of their hair rolling white ash."
Only."
Shen Dayye whispered.Chen Xiaozhi's voice was extremely soft, and he mumbled, hugged the girl's house, and pinched her soft ears.Shen Dayye sighed comfortably, rolled into his arms, and said seriously: "......
It didn't take long, but I already missed you. ”The young man's laughter echoed in his chest, as dull as rain and thunder on a spring night: "Me too." ”The two of them lay down for a while, and Chen Xiaozhi suddenly said, "......
Your dad is really good at talking. ”Shen Dayye was stunned for a moment, and then smiled his eyes into two small crescents: "He's a teacher." ”"Can all teachers speak like that?"
“…… I don't know about this, but I'm going to be able to talk about it, right?
”"......," Chen Xiaozhi, who has always not liked to express himself and only likes to scold, paused for a while, and said very troubledly: "Then am I not suitable to be a teacher?"
”Shen Dayye rolled in his arms domineeringly, and pressed his hard, looking for a more comfortable position: "University teacher doesn't have to say much, Sheldon?"
Cooper can do it, rest assured. ”Chen Xiaozhi was pressed bitterly: "Why do you surnamed Shen even have the same posture as my cat?"
- And you're comparing Sheldon to me?
Sheldon was smashed with an egg by his student, and he's almost the same as you, right?
”Shen Dayye pressed his chest hard, propped up his body to look at Professor Chen, and then said arrogantly, "You fart." ”"......"
"My social features are very good.""......"
Shen Dayye added: "I'm still a natural alpha." ”"......," Chen Xiaozhi said expressionlessly, "Oh." ”The natural alpha lasted for a while and got tired and lay on top of him.The sunlight fluttered between the panes.“…… Shen Dayye. ”He called suddenly."
Huh?""
Didn't your dad say he would always watch you and never leave?"
The girl was stunned: "Huh?
What's wrong......?
”Chen Xiaozhi was silent for a while, hugged the girl and asked, "Then do you think he has ...... now?"
Shen Daye: "......" and "............" were awkwardly silent for a while."
It should ......
Yes. ”In the next second, Chen Xiaozhi awkwardly removed the hand on her waist, and Shen Dayye removed his hand from his chest in a weak heart.It was a long time later."
Shen Dayye."
Chen Xiaozhi suddenly said thoughtlessly: "......
Your dad entrusted you to me, you know?
”The girl was even more stunned: "Yes......
Is it?
”"Hmm."
So Shen Dayye lay on him and blinked in shock.Chen Xiaozhi stroked the girl's dusty hair, pushed her up with his knees, and hugged her, so the two of them were very close to each other, looking at each other.In the early morning of winter, the floor-to-ceiling windows are blown by the wind, and the outside is freezing, but on the other side of the glass, only the quiet dust is condensed in the air, and the sunlight flows like water on the wooden floor.“…… Only only. ”The unconscious thing looked into his eyes and said blankly."
Huh?"
She stretched out her hand and hooked Chen Xiaozhi's hair, and the dust was like catkins on a spring day.Then the girl said, "......
You've got a lot of dust on your head.It's like gray hair. ”At that moment, Chen Xiaozhi felt that her heart was clutched into a ball by her.And she always has been.Shen Dayye held Chen Xiaozhi's life and heart in his hands, holding Chen Xiaozhi's life box, and the girl's eyes were clear and focused when she patted the dust off his head; When she looked at him, his hair was white, as if he had been covered with a veil of age, as if both of them had turned white overnight.-- If you can grow old together.Chen Xiaozhiguang thought of these four words, and his heartbeat could turn into thunder.He looked up and wanted to kiss her, he wanted to hug his lover.His young heart was about to leap out of his chest, like a moon vibrating between heaven and earth.When his lips were close, Shen Dayye suddenly opened his mouth without a tail: "......
What if Dad is watching?
”Chen Xiaozhi: "......"
Shen Dayye: "Didn't he say that he would keep looking at us?"
”Chen Xiaozhi said: "............"
Shen Dayye rubbed his lips, looked left and right, and said uneasily: "It's just you who said, isn't it a little embarrassing to be watched by your father to do this kind of thing?"
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”Chen Xiaozhi was silent for a long time, and finally said, "......
Possibly. ”Then he was a little firmer: "But whatever." ”After saying that, they kissed softly in the early morning sun.Shen Dayye was stunned for a moment, then hugged his neck with a smile: "You're right. ”"-- whatever?"
-Light and shadow fade in the dust.The two children, whose hair was dyed with gilt light, hugged each other tightly and lay on the floor kissing.-……………… This journey always seems to have some pilgrimage meaning.But the pilgrimage is not to go to Washington, but to find a piece of sand in one's heart.For this reason, they are running around in the earthly world - Chen Xiaozhi held the steering wheel and hurried on the national highway where the truck roared, Shen Dayye looked out the window at the dust and cacti that had dissipated, and his fluffy hair was blown messy by the wind.On New Year's Day, they roughly cleaned up the house of the Xia Shen Dayye family.Most of the things are old, the sofa in the living room is covered with a cloth, and the TV is still 06 years old, heavy and solid pressed against the TV cabinet.There wasn't a single book in the study, the security in Washington was good, and the house might or may not have been burglarized, but the thieves didn't touch the books that were actually worth a lot.-- Thieves never steal books.Chen Xiaozhi looked at the wall of books: "Did your father use all his salary to buy books?"
”Shen Dayye said seriously: "It's not true. ”Then she thought about it for a moment and said pertinently, "Most of the funding." ”“…… Also. ”Chen Xiaozhi laughed.…… They went room after room, sweeping through.The warm winter sun poured down, and every picture frame in the room was upside down.Shen Dayye still remembers that hanging on the kitchen wall was a group photo they took at Disneyland in Orlando, with Dad holding Mom's waist and Xiao Dayye holding the mermaid Ariel next to her.And the purpose of the upside-down buckle is not to prevent oxidation or dust accumulation, it was on the day of the memorial service that her mother turned it over one by one.And she had been shedding tears all the time.Shen Dayye didn't even dare to cry at that time, for fear that her mother would completely collapse when she saw her tears.She knew that her parents loved each other since she was a child, and she also knew that her father's death made her mother reluctant to face his past, the house they lived in together, the university they worked in, the city they lived in, and even the photos they took together.She stood in front of the kitchen wall and hesitated for a moment, then turned the frame over.- The frame is empty, it has been removed.All that remains of the "......" is a dusty piece of glass.Shen Dayye was stunned, and then looked at the other photo frames, but found that the upside-down and upturned photo frames were empty.Someone took the photos years ago.“…… Mom. ”The girl murmured in the golden red sunlight that filled the room.Chen Xiaozhi was wiping the trinkets on the fireplace with a rag, and was immediately stunned: "What?
”“…… My mother," Shen said hoarsely, rubbing his fingers over the blank frame, "I finally brought these photos home." ”- Even the scars that are deep enough to see the bones will be erased by time.And just like Shen's mother said on her daughter's phone: - There are people in the world who are mediocre and shallow, and some people are wrapped in silk and satin, but the inside is full of straw.Yet one day, you will meet someone who is as colorful as a rainbow.Since then, all beings have been nothing more than a passing moment.They have been separated from life and death, but they still love each other.-……………… The day we set off for home was still a sunny day.Chen Xiaozhi was driving in front, and Shen Dayye leaned against the RV window lazily basking in the sun.The winter vacation in the United States is short, only three weeks before and after, but there is a feeling of being separated from the world.The fiery red earth was frozen firm, and the wind blew the tumbleweeds rolling around, but the wind brought a wisp of spring freshness.-- Spring in California may be coming soon.Shen Dayye looked at the frozen tundra and thought."
Chen Xiaozhi."
Shen Dayye suddenly called.Chen Xiaozhi's car sped down the interstate highway and hummed nonchalantly."
I've been wondering for so long," the girl said, "what is the so-called 'meaning'?"
”Chen Xiaozhi raised his eyebrows slightly and motioned for her to say."
That is, the meaning of our existence, the meaning of the existence of our race."
Shen Dayye wrapped himself in a blanket and said blankly, "......
The nature of this universe tends to be disordered, and it does not stop increasing entropy, and we will learn in middle school that the second law of thermodynamics, the second type of perpetual motion machine can never be realized, and dS will always be greater than or equal to 0......"
Chen Xiaozhi looked at her quietly from the rearview mirror."
But why do we spend thousands of years searching for an answer in this disordered and chaotic universe?"
Chen Xiaozhi laughed: "Why do you think it is?"
”Shen Dayye thought for a moment and said, "Because we have to believe that it's there." ”"We must believe that there is an answer in this world," Shen said, "even if quantum mechanics cuts the world into meaningless pieces, turns time into rotten fruit, and burns the universe that we have tried to understand for thousands of years; Even if humanity has been stagnant for nearly half a century after the Big Bang of basic science in the 20th century, we still have to believe it. ”"Half a century ago, we believed that human beings would travel and settle the universe.Guardians of the Galaxy and StarTrek are both works of that era, in which the Interstellar Federation is equal for all beings and has a vast territory, covering 8,000 light-years wide; But half a century later, we are still on the earth, just holding a small screen in our hands. ”"So we lied to ourselves that it was a lifestyle change brought about by technology."
Shen Dayye sighed abruptly: "......
It's been too long. ”It's been too long, more than seventy years, almost the life of an individual.Most people forget that their ancestors once trampled the blue sky under their feet, and that they killed the last god in the world with a piece of calculus paper and a pen.Seventy years after this almost static period, no one is talking in a café about Camus and existentialism, about the fusion of mathematics and physics, about apricot cocktails and black holes; People are passionate about living in the world, talking about graphene and transistors, talking about OLED and transistor, debating 4G and 5G and the evolution of the Internet.People look at strange things, but no one cares about the essence of things."
But we must nevertheless, we must believe," said the girl, bathed in the fiery red sun, "that there is an answer to all our questions. ”"Although no one knows if there really is such a thing," the girl said, "no one knows for sure whether the answer to it is above our level of knowledge; No one knows if we will be able to reach the end of the long river of knowledge and see the ultimate answer to the puzzle of the universe. ”"But," Shen Dayye looked at the distant sunset of the long river: "Our race is only like this, and there is only this - only to seek, to tirelessly ask questions and hit the wall and kowtow to the blood, to march to the unknown wall, to challenge the frozen mountains for the truth, to make pilgrimages, to ask, to explore." ”"And it has to be that way.EsMussSein。
”She paused, and then added, "This is what makes up the 'meaning' of our race. ”In the sky of the Big Dipper, the sunset melts into the earth, and the Gobi is like a fire in the prairie fire.The girl looked out the window and stopped talking.In that eternal time, only silence poured on them like spring rain.- Something is sprouting.-- There was something more expansive, more majestic, more glorious and heavy, which rained down.It loosened the soil and raised its head on the earth.