When Rong Xin and I were still friends, oh no, maybe when I was still maintaining a superficial friend, she once said to me such a sentence: The so-called unrequited love is fucking looking for abuse, a little abuse is not enough, I have to abuse to the point that the liver and intestines are broken, and I scold the other party scum in a big understanding I think I am the kind of person Rong Xin said, knowing that it is impossible to find abuse, and deserving of abuse to death, and blaming others for not appreciating it.Although I haven't gotten to the point of scolding Beixi's scum, I've almost been abused to the point of breaking my liver and intestines, but I'm still struggling to keep that feeling, expecting him to look back at himself.knew that Han Xi was walking with Beixi that day, but he was still flustered when he saw him carrying a big bag of snacks and walking towards Han Xi.Fortunately, Cheng Xiaoguang's timely appearance didn't make that farce come back to Beixi.After all, I quarreled with Han Xi that day, but fortunately, the girl named Cheng Xiaoguang came out and didn't end up embarrassed.In fact, I was still afraid, afraid that my image in Beixi's heart would become more unbearable and ugly.He once trampled on my self-esteem in front of so many people and said heartless words.He is such a handsome and gentle person, why is he so ruthless and unsparing He hated me for being dirty, said that I was disgusting, and turned around and pulled the girl who made me the most jealous away.He doted on her, and even devoted himself to her.Maybe he had kissed different girls in a jerk, tall, short, fat, thin, perfect, or ordinary, but he only had a girl named Su Hanxi in his heart.So Han Hee's Su, Su Han Hee's Han, Su Han Hee's Hee.No one but her.It is said that the bystander is clear, I am so careful and careful to figure out his emotions, how can I not see the love in his eyes He likes her so much, and she said that she doesn't like him; He gave everything sincerely for her, but she didn't give anything for him.But Su Hanxi is the real winner, she doesn't have to pay anything, she has won his most dedicated love Gu Beixi.Just because she was the person he was shouting when he was drunk, how could she not make me jealous, but I clearly understood that it was difficult for me to let go of Beixi.Looking at the colorful scraps of paper on the desk, I was a little hypocritical and wanted to vent and cry.It's more like shredded paper than a torn love letter.On the day of the bar, I returned to my bedroom after leaving Arlo, and turned over all the little love letters that I had written to Beixi, which had been carefully stacked and neatly folded.Then he howled and cried like a vent, scolding Beixi for not believing in himself, only Su Hanxi was a slut in his eyes, scolding himself for living in the shadow of Ah Luo, but he was unwilling to reach out and pull himself, and then the colored papers that were carefully written day and night were torn up before they could be given to their owners.Like the petals of a flower in the sky, they shattered into pieces, and it also burned my teary eyes.I will never forget the humility and caution I like to go to the North Seat.I was afraid that I would say something wrong and make him angry, and I was afraid that he would suddenly ignore him, so I became cautious and carefully considered what I wanted to say before daring to spit it out slowly from my mouth.Even not far from him, timidly watching him, paying attention to his every move, word and deed.Even if I didn't move forward bravely, I couldn't stand beside him as a matter of course, and convey all my affection with a smile in my eyes.But I'm also satisfied, satisfied to be able to look at him from afar.The sentiment was sweet and sour, but I couldn't be happier.I laughed self-deprecatingly, Xiang Qingtian wake up your dream, dreams are just dreams, nightmares or beautiful dreams, whether you dream that Beixi is with you or not, you are not possible, isn't it clear What's more, there are so many twists and turns and outrageous and dirty things, do you think he Gu Beixi will still have a good face for you Xiang Qingtian, don't forget, he quarreled with you for a girl, and now you parted ways with that girl, do you think you still have a chance to get close to him It's really a fool's dream.The moment the "broken relationship" was spoken, I really regretted it and wanted to redeem it.Although there is some leeway for that sentence to be spoken, I also understand that even if we can get back together and reconcile as before, we will never be able to release our old suspicions.Between us, there is not just a north seat, the deepest gap between us is the stubbornness of our mutual refusal to bow our heads first.We are all still talking and laughing stubbornly, stubbornly not crying, and we are also stubbornly giving ourselves reasonable excuses.I thought about the pain of losing Beixi, it would be a pain that was so painful that it was difficult to suffocate, like a ruthless pair of hands, desperately pinching his neck and refusing to let go.In the end, I blushed and struggled to give up, and in the end I was still deceiving myself.But I never thought that I would be so painful to lose Han Xi.I hate her, I hate everything about her, but I still like her smiling face, always so warm that it can expel the coldness in my heart.I found that the loss of Han Xi is also as painful as the loss of Beixi, if I can go back and choose, if I don't love it, will the result change I don't think it will be, my heart is lost to the unpredictability of the world, no matter who will be the initial introduction, I will come to this point.Little by little, picking up the scraps of paper on the table, I laughed softly, but it became far-fetched again.This used to be all that was on my mind, but now it has been destroyed by me.Holding the thin piece of colored paper, I slowly walked to the balcony, raised my head to look at the dense clouds, and suddenly reached out and scattered all the pieces of paper with a wicked smile.One by one, like the petals of a flower, they gently slide down in their own spinning course, and the movements are gentle and beautiful, a little more beautiful than the autumn leaves fluttering in the wind.His eyes slid down with the piece of paper, but he accidentally caught a glimpse of a familiar figure out of the corner of his eye, as tall and conspicuous as usual, and the soft light fell on his shoulders with a chaotic warmth.I was so frightened that I hurriedly hid in the toilet next to me, clenching my hands tightly, afraid that I would run out, and shouted at him shamelessly.How could he wait for Han Xi under the girls' dormitory It is impossible for them to come to the dormitory since they broke off their friendship that day, Han Xi and the others have not returned to the dormitory, do you think of this I smiled bitterly again, Xiang Qingtian What are you expecting, how could he come to you He already hates you so much that he doesn't want to see you, how can he come to the girls' dormitory to find you, you are really narcissistic to shamelessness.I exhaled, thinking that it was impossible for him to find himself, so I walked out calmly, standing on the balcony and pretending to look at the scenery casually, but the afterglow fell on him without leaving a trace.He looked up and casually glanced up, as if looking at me and casually, but it was enough to set off the waves and waves in my heart.He looked around slightly, and through the contact lens, I was able to catch the smiling smile on the corner of his mouth.His heart sank suddenly, his clenched fists loosened and tightened, and in the end, he didn't know what he was thinking at this time.He bent down to pick up a piece of paper, and when he touched the words on it, his eyebrows couldn't help but wrinkle deeply, and even his thin lips were tightly pursed.My heart suddenly tightened, afraid that he knew something, but I was a little glad that he had seen a piece of paper, even if it was just a small broken piece of paper, it was enough for me to look forward to.As I watched him expectantly, eager to know some of his thoughts, he slipped into his trouser pocket and turned away without a hint of nostalgia.It seems that there is something that is slowly shattering in the invisible world, and finally becomes a sharp blade on the tip of the heart, pricking the heart and the pain of the whole body.Hope and disappointment are not only as short as a word, but also as short as a millisecond."
Beixi, I'm in the XX boutique on XX Street, I'll wait for you" quickly hung up the phone, and I squatted down in frustration while standing at the door, covering my mouth and sobbing softly.Xiang Qingtian, after going through so much, why can you still be brazen to go to him I only know that I don t want to miss Beixi if I miss Han Xi.Just like Rong Xin said, even if the fish dies and the net is broken, as long as he turns back for the last time, he will be scolded by people for his unscrupulous routines, and he will feel at ease.I'm on the edge of this extreme, and as long as I don't regret it, I can hold on to everything I want.After standing at the door of the boutique for an hour, I finally walked into the boutique with the owner's suspicious face.The store is unexpectedly spacious and warm, with a light pink pattern depicting a small girl's heart, and a dazzling array of boutiques dazzling my eyes.My eyes were wide open, and I was looking at all kinds of fine products with novelty, and my desire to buy them all began to stir.My eyes and footsteps fell on a crane machine at the same time, looking at the rag doll closed in the window, I was a little confused and a little complicated, as if I remembered my distant cousin in front of me, chattering about how beautiful and exciting the crane machine was.At that time, I was full of imaginary crane machines in my childhood, and I was particularly envious of my cousin.I didn't expect to meet it with my own eyes now, but I lost the initial excitement, and only the indescribable complexity remained."
Auntie, I'm going to exchange ten coins."
I walked slowly to the shopkeeper, exchanged ten coins from her, and somewhat awkwardly threw the coins into the crane machine, only to become overwhelmed the moment the voice sounded.It wasn't until the shopkeeper reminded me that I came to my senses and looked at the doll in the window, and for the first time, I picked up the doll I had in mind as the red numbers became smaller and smaller.I didn't expect that there are always too many unexpected and unexpected things in life, so I was not surprised at all when I stood in front of the crane machine at this moment.Although I still can't let go of the doll in my memory, I have also lost the attachment of childlike fun.So-so, I finished throwing ten coins, and not a single doll was clamped, I was in high spirits, and I didn't wait for the north seat for a long time, so I simply walked out.The rain was still falling, and the cold wind was biting on my body, but I gritted my teeth but still couldn't stop shivering.The splashing rain fell on my bare legs and was cold for a while, but it was not good to stand at the door all the time, so I had to buy an umbrella and stand by the vending machine next to it.Time passed unconsciously, I looked at my phone, it was more than two hours before I called, gritted my teeth, and I called again.The phone couldn't be picked up for a long time, and I put down my phone decadently, thinking that Beixi would definitely not come, but I was unwilling to wait for him.After making a few more calls and not answering, I stopped calling and stared at the screen in a daze.The rain was getting heavier and heavier, and I pursed my lips and curled up on the vending machine in disappointment.Maybe I really can't wait for him, but I'm not willing to wait for so long.The wind blew my head dizzy, and my stiff hand finally failed to hold the umbrella and was blown away by the wind.I hugged myself tightly, and when my vision blurred, as if I saw the north seat running towards me, I opened my mouth with difficulty, and whispered his name, hoping that it was not an illusion."
Xiang Qingtian, I've never met such a stupid girl as you."
The hot in my arms was so familiar, my nose was sore, and I hugged Beixi and cried bitterly.I called his name, crying uncontrollably, but also glad that I had waited for him, and waited for his belated embrace
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